perfecting parenthood

out of our 'normal' weekend schedule, dh and i spent the afternoon 'away' from C. we originally planned to bring her along but in the end, my parents called up early in the morning and offered to babysit her (i'm glad we didn't bring her along eventually - some of the parents did and their kids were screaming, shouting and crying in the auditorium and thus 'disturbing' the rest of us but i don't blame the kids - they don't know any better). our local tv station put together a short afternoon seminar titled 'perfecting parenthood', which i'd thought would be pretty interesting (and so, dragged dh along) - i mean, parenting is probably one of the biggest responsibilities we will ever have in our entire lives yet it is an area that we don't receive any formal training other than by observing our parents (and maybe other parents) and through our own experiences as a child (i was brought up like that and i like/dislike it so i'm going/not going to do that to my child). i should probably add that i don't particularly enjoy going for seminars coz most of the time, the speaker IS trying to sell you something (whether its some materials, a course or some ideals) but i do pick up one or two thoughts that i can incorporate in my life. i want to write about this seminar because i want YOU to remind me of these somewhere down the road, should i 'deviate' drastically from my current school of thoughts so there...

thoughts for today:

#1. there is no such thing as a perfect parent - we all do the best we can and (for most), we do it for the love of our child(ren) - so its ok if we trip sometimes - just apologise and move on.

#2. focus on the effort and not the results

#3. focus on her/his aspirations and dreams, not my dreams and aspirations for her/him.

obviously as a parent, i do the best i can for her and to me, many of the things i do are instinctive and thus, i don't make a big deal about it - e.g. i made the decision to breastfeed her even before she was born, i allow her to co-sleep with us for security, i chose to spend more time with her than with my work, etc. occasionally, i come across people who make a big deal about the decisions that i make (and worse, challenge me!) and it irks me. i can only say this - the parent(s) knows best, so MYOB (Mind Your Own Biz)!